In life we have many aspects in which we behave a certain way. Some people call them manners, but we can even go as far as naming them “rules”. Rules in business, social settings, and of course dating, force us to examine a certain way to behave. By following these rules we are guaranteed success. What are the rules? Who created them? Why are they held in such a high regard?

Manners are defined as “ways of living, and habits of a people, class, or period”. Given the definition, it is obvious that the rules change with time and even race or background. Now, I’m not talking about traditions. That is a different topic all together. I am talking about the way we are raised to cut our food, or chew our gum a certain way in the company of others. When we are brought up, we are taught the rules of life, under the impression that they are merely suggestions. As we grow up we realize that they are suggestions that should be followed, some, obviously, more than others.

Let’s examine one of the events in life with the biggest list of rules. I am talking, of course, about dating. The “three-day rule” is one of the most common. The three-day rule states that after a first date you must wait at least three days before you can call her again. Now, I am absolutely positive that women have a set of rules all to themselves. However, since I have a penis, and that automatically makes me completely clueless on anything to do with the female perspective, I can only do this from a mans point of view (which is probably wrong, right ladies?). The rules for a guy are fairly obvious, not a real secret, and for the most part have not changed. However, some of these rules have changed with the times. Thanks to equality, we can now take a girl out and can actually accept money from them for the check… if we wanted to be really tacky. Not to mention your date would probably be turned off by such an act. On the brighter side, most women are thrown off by some of us who still get out of the car to ring the bell and show face, instead of honking the horn or calling on the phone. When I say thrown off, I don’t mean it in a negative way. They are usually very appreciative of acts such as that. This list goes on and on, so let’s examine more rules, like tattoos.

Tattoos are becoming more socially acceptable, but are still looked down upon by some. The rules to getting a tattoo are not to get them in an extremely visible location. If you go for a job interview, it looks bad. The interviewers and company representatives are the “some” I was talking about. Unfortunately, that has become one of the unwritten rules. Because of that fact, if you are looking at getting a job in a good company, you shouldn’t get tattoos that are visible. Then what’s the point of getting it? Ladies and gentlemen, that is the point.

We have become so apt at following these rules that we are no longer doing what we feel we should do. Why should I have to wait three days to talk to a girl I really like? I read in a book somewhere about fighting that when you’re in a situation, or fight as the book was explaining, the other person is experiencing the same human feelings as you are. All the nervousness and anxiety is mirrored in the other person. I think that statement can apply to any situation. In dating, the other person you are attracted to is probably feeling the same nervousness or desire to call as you are. Why do we have to follow these rules? These unwritten rules are an attempt to appear a certain way instead of following our gut. What can happen if we chose to go against the rules? The world certainly isn’t going to end, but you DO risk showing the other person that you are in fact human.